My friends and I have been invited to the wedding of a Vietnamese woman who used to be my former colleague, now turned to be one of my good friends. And I love all of them!
Life is too short for pretensions. Life is too short for lies.Life is too short for unhappiness.Life is too short for not being vulnerable, open and raw to someone that you love.
I am a messy heart woman.I believe in faith.I believe in change.I believe in good karma.I believe “perfection” doesn’t exist.I believe HAPPINESS is your personal responsibility .I believe girls dream to walk down the aisle with her hubby. But I also believe that marriage is not for everybody.I have read and witness with my laid eyes that several couples who are younger or even older than me get separated because they realized that they are not yet ready.Not ready to face their challenges along with bumpy roads and brokenness. Not ready to accept that they are two different people who have dont’s and wont’s in life.Not ready to give up something to be able to move forward with whom the person you pass your life.Some of us are too immature to tie the knot and we can’t even take care of ourselves, how much more taking care to the person who wants to sleep with the same bed with the rest of your life.You know what, if you can’t make a decision on something, how did you ever decide to marry your partner? As if you say, Love just happens, yeah? I understand, you love him. But love is more than a feeling but also a conscious decision to commit.A decision you will make every single day of your life to love him even how much you crave that feeling you had before when the first time your eyes meet, your hands touch and the “tingly” feeling in your body every time you see him.But relationship is not always like that, it’s not perfect all the way. Time comes, when it brings relationship to dark and tension-filled place. You learn he’s jealous, his unethical way of making decisions or opinions, he’s too controlling and you start to fight. Then it happens, you meet a new person who gives you butterflies and makes your heart flutter again.And then, you tell your partner that you need space.Or, maybe you just fade away. And then, it ends.
Funny how it works.But I think he’s not the partner you want, it’s what you think he can give you.
I know, as human as we are, we’re social gluttons of sorts.We want to be loved.We want to be taken care of. We wanted to feel like a Cinderella who will sweep us off in our feet and make us happier than we have ever been.But can we really expect our partners to make us happy all the time? Do you think it’s really fair for him or her? I guess, you’re demanding love instead of sharing your love.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t rely on him for support and love.It just means that you don’t depend on him to lessen the discomfort of being yourself.That’s not the right approach to a healthy relationship.You have to work and grow together instead of avoiding growth by depending TOO MUCH on each other.Even if how messy and soft both of you, it’s not an excuse to let them contain you-because no one can fix you but only yourself.You have to learn to love your self first before loving someone else.Because even if you find the right person and eventually you’re expecting too much from her and ended up she was not able to fill in the happiness that you wanted to be.Well, I guess you’re not yet ready because you have so much insecurities in your life.Insecurities that makes us demanding.Insecurities that makes us needy. Insecurities that makes us submissive.In short, you’re not happy and comfortable with your own skin.
Let say, you have bought a tote bag today because you find it simple and on the following day, you saw your friend with a new bag and you realized it was prettier than yours because it has a lot of compartments inside.And you’re crying inside because you want it badly.You have never thought to be contented of what you have and what you don’t have.Same goes with love, it’s not all about searching the right person but also learning to love the person that you have found.If you haven’t found the person yet, then don’t rush into things that makes you regret.Marriage is not the only thing that you have to look forward in this life because there are so much into life than revolving your heart to significant other. For now, make your ultimate project to grow and that is being HAPPY.Because if you’re a happy person, I’m pretty sure you will attract happy partner and HAPPY LIFE.
What about you, do you believe in true love? If yes, please don’t forget to spill the good vibes by sharing this post to your happy friends. We love you all!!!!